Video Dating- A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

Usually when you meet someone online and start chatting with them, you assume that the interaction will have a natural progression.  Initially, the introductions complete with the ‘what do you do’, ‘where do you live’ and ‘what are you looking for’ are taken care of first.   I have a certain style when I chat online and flirt and if a guy can’t keep up then I usually move along. 

I don’t normally go to video unless I’m asked as I find it somewhat unnatural and if we’re typing (as opposed to chatting onscreen) then it becomes a  matter of staring at the top of someone’s head (or their bald spot) which I don’t find really helps with making a  connection.

The positive to video chat is that you get to make sure that the guy you’re chatting with has posted current and real images of himself.  I try to keep my images up to date so that if and when I do meet someone, there aren’t any surprises.  Apparently this concept does not cross many men’s minds. 

I had a particularly interesting video chat one time with a guy out in BC.  I’m in Ontario so I wasn’t really counting on meeting this guy.  This ended up being a good thing.   The conversation started off well enough with the usual interchanges.  He was a bit younger I am (try 10 years) but I decided to chat with him anyway for the hell of it.   He had just bought a new camera for his pc and was getting it set up so we paused our conversation for a few minutes in the hopes that he would get his cam set up.  Twenty minutes later he pops back up.... and I freeze in my seat!   He actually asked if my camera was working because I didn’t move for a good 20 seconds.  I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.  He was definitely the same guy from the pictures on his profile but he was at least 10 years older and about 100 lbs heavier.  Now I’m the last person to judge someone by their weight or appearance but he looked like he had just rolled out of bed and even admitted as much, claiming he looked like sh*@.   I mean REALLY??  Did he not think that I would notice a difference between his images and the view on my laptop screen?!! 

Needless to say, I discontinued the conversation.  That’s actually putting it nicely.  I shut the application off because I couldn’t even verbalize my shock to him.   Since then I’ve been somewhat wary of video chatting for obvious reasons.   I still partake in them from time to time but only when I have a decent feel for the person I’m chatting with.    Nonetheless, I get lots of requests to video chat.  Most of them just want a flash of something or to show me how big (or small) their pertinent anatomy is. 

I guess men have to live up their reputation when it comes to dating.  Don’t get me wrong.  I love men and obviously want to connect with one but some of them could use a bit of finesse when it comes to meeting women.   Scratch that. Men could use some common sense when it comes to meeting women.

The moral of this story is, put your best foot forward.  In the online dating scene, you only get one chance with someone.  If you’re not being honest right off the bat, then what chance do you have to have an honest and open relationship.